Reserve a ticket on the 2012 ark through Taobao!

Taobao user Lee Hawk is offering reserved tickets on one of the 2012 arks.

One billion euro gets you safe passage through the global cataclysm:

2012 Ark Ticket

Buy now price: 10,000,000 yuan

Shipping: Seller pays shipping fees

Product description

Reservations for ark ticket for the year 2012 (blue; no other class available for the time being) are in full swing. Reserve now for a discounted price.

Ticket price: 1,000,000,000 euro. If you pay using some other currency, this will be calculated using an exchange rate set by our company.

This ticket is used for boarding the ark at the Cho Ming landing. Tickets for sale on Taobao for any other landing are all fake.

Disclaimers

1. Tickets are non-refundable and non-transferable;

2. The ticket price is for the passenger’s transit aboard the ark and does not include transportation to and from the landing or food, entertainment, communication, and any other expenses on board;

3. Children between the ages of 2 and 12 may purchase half-price tickets. Tickets for infants under the age of 2 are 10% of an adult fare, but they are not given a seat of their own. Each adult passenger can have no more than one accompanying infant ticket;

4. Tickets utilize matrix code technology that records identifying information specific to each passenger. Do not fold or smudge the code section of the ticket to ensure that the information is not lost.

Prospective buyers have posed some questions to the seller:

Q: The official price is 1 billion euro, but you’re selling them for just 10 million RMB. Are yours real?

A: The price here is also 1 billion euro. I’ve clearly noted in the product description that the RMB price issue is because of Taobao’s restrictions on prices. Such a substantial deal will have to be conducted offline.

Q: After the reconstruction following the disaster, will we receive residence permits? If I purchase two tickets, will I receive a mayorship?

A: Hello. The boat ticket is only good for transit and has no other function, not even expenses while on board.

Q: Will the door be unable to open before we board the boat?

A: You must have faith in the ability of our country to organize massive events. At the very least, there will be no problems with the Chinese ark during the boarding process.

Q: Are there discounts for group purchases?

A: Yes, for group purchases of 1,000 tickets or more. There are additional incentives if you do not need a tax receipt.

Q: Will you accept cash on delivery?

A: I’m sorry, that’s not possible. However, it’s normal to have misgivings over such a large sum, so the deal can be conducted through a third-party guarantor.

The sale started on 22 November and lasts until the 29th.

Additionally, the same seller is offering a Microsoft Sidewinder FFB2 joystick for 1,200 yuan:

You’ll find out after watching 2012 that it’s pretty useful to know how to fly a plane!

This winter, stay at home to practice flying!